The Travel Show

This is what happens when you cross family fun with a bit of S&M.
Do you need to liven up those family suppers, birthday parties, or anniveraries?
Got some outta-town peeps you haven't seen in years popping in for a meal
and a 'do you remember when..' chat?
Look no further...

Impact Marketing

Based on the recent birth of the REVOLVO brand and the initialisation of it's first product ranges and concept, I came to a realisation - I'm not really sure I know the clear differences between marketing, advertising, media strategy, branding, copyrighting and a whole myriad of professions that I have previously just lumped as Marketing.
Yet these sectors employ a shit load of people and generate a ton of cash.
Curiouser and Curioser.
So if you work in one of these professions or a related field, drop us a post and tell use about your job.
I may have to hire these people @ REVOLVO

For al julle tight people out there

The Art of Blending Into a Crowd!

This is for Phil who needs some form of camouflage to help him blend into a crowd when stalking his next prey. Just wear this and she won't notice you sneak up on her.

Hot off the Press (So pas gedruk)

For those of you who think that you have problems with either the men or women in you lives. Just know that someone else may have it worse.

I know you may be getting a bit desperate for a bit of action - so the flatmate, the bestfriends druggy sibling, Won-Long at the laundry or the cleaning lady at Quick Spar may even start to appeal to you - there are certain lines that should not be crossed

(Sister Mary Champs - was this you??)

A Weird or 2

Ok, I have been a bit slack. I have been word tagged by both Suavy (Q) and Doll (R). So I've decided to kill 2 birds with one stone. I have choosen words that contain both Q & R. Might as well have fun with it.




Qualifer -The criteria I use when identifying a prospective female specimen for fornication
Quart -The appropritate size serving of drink I consume while surveying the the target area
Quarry -The woman I decide will be the object of my attention
Queer -That strange retrosexual individual who inevitably is hangingout with the target and whom I need to dispose of before I can lavish my attention on the choosen victim
Quaver - That seductive musical note and sound, the hint of which is manifest in her voice when you suggest a change in location
Quiver - That light tremble I feel running through her thigh while lightly stroking the back of her knee, ever so slowly inching north
Quagmire - The sudden feeling of indecision and helplessness when I realise that the 6 pack of condoms I'm carrying may not be enough
Quicker - The cry from her lips as she enters the euphoric state where erogenis receptors are overloaded with sensation
Quaker - This woman lying next to me who is still overpowered by post-coital tremors an hour after the initial penetration
Quadriplegic - That woman lying is my bed when I left for the office.Don't know why she could not speak or move, but see did seem a bit tired. Oh well

OK , I tag Cuddle & Monster - to be different give us words starting with n that are hypenated.

New iPOD accessories for the girls!

I wonder if it play .MP3s ? Any volunteers?

The early bird catches PNEUMONIA !

Let me start off by saying that I am not a morning person, never have been and never will be. I get my lazy ass out of bed at about 8:00am and start my working day at 9:00-9:30am. I do tend to work late but don't try and get me to operate in the morning - nothing happens before my first cup of coffee and a cigarette.

Secondly, I don't mind the heat, never feel it but I do not handle the cold well at all.

Which brings us the the recent Jozi trip. Flew in Monday evening and while it seemed cold I didn't mind too much - it is winter after all. The real fun started the following morning as the course I was attending started at 7:30am. As I was staying in Midrand and the course in Bryanston, I had to allocate a fair amount of time for travel. So there's me getting my sorry ass out of bed at 6:00am (WTF!) to depart by 6:40am. What struck me was the c..c..c..cold throughout the day and therefore the previous post.

While I managed to lubricate the nights rather well with copious amounts of alcohol to ward off the cold, the following morning the vicious cycle would repeat. I'm not use to having to defrost my fucking car in the morning but maybe if I had Rum & Coke for breakfast instead of coffee, I could just snap a slab of ice off the car and put it in my drink.

What I had managed to do was to plan my week so that I had only one late morning client meeting on Friday. This meant I could sleep in, get the business out the way, score some lunch and prep for the planned nite out with friends. I booked my flight back Saturday afternoon so that any late night/early morning debaucherous behaviour won't result in me missing my flight.

Well, you know what they say about 'the best laid plans'. Thursday afternoon I get a call from the office asking me how busy my schedule is as it has become quite vital that I attend a planing session on Friday(fuck, fuck, fuck). Now here's where things start to get really ugly. It's to late for me to change my ticket to a Thursday nite flight so my only option is to fly Friday morning.

Yip, that's right. Screw attending the course at 7:00am, I'm now trying to catch the 6:45am flight out of Jozi. Now there are 2 factors that aggravate this situation - firstly, that you need to check-in at least an hour before the flight, secondly, I'm not actually booked on the flight so I need to get to the airport early enough to have time to change my booking. So after making it to bed at midnight, there's my sorry icy ass getting up at 4:30 am to fly back to warmer climes.

(On the way to the airport I spotted this unfortunate couple who obviously got caught out in the cold)

Now here's the real kicker, when we get back to Cape Town, the pilot informs us that Cape Town International is fogged in and we have 35min loiter time before we have to divert to the alternate site. Now since George Aiport is also fogged in we'll have to divert to Port Elizabeth. (You have got to be fucking kidding me!! I just paid R900 to upgrade this ticket just to make this meeting).

Well after going round and round and round.....with 5 min to spare, the fog clears and we finally land. To baggage, parking payment and rush to meeting...oops! the airport turnoff on to the highway is closed and none of the stupid fucking road surface miners had the presence of mind to put a fucking sign at the airport. U turn, find alternate route onto highway. OK, get to meeting really late, if not a bit stressed.

Well at least I'm finally here and all that shit is over...or is it.
When I leave at 5:45pm some security retard has clamped my car because I apparently I shouldn't have parked in the bay where they indicated I should park...of all the stupid fucking idiotic bird brained dipshit turd squeezing foreskin trimming ideas...

So I'm off to Durban next week & I'm contemplating taking out some sort gremlin insurance. Anyone know how I get this cover???